As you have hopefully already read, so far in my return to the felt I was learning a lot while losing a lot. I was getting more and more comfortable at the table, and I was starting to get more stoic in my reactions to the things that happened during poker games.
Unfortunately, I was also watching my bankroll go down as I played more which was starting to make me think it was possible that I was going to burn through it and have to go back to work at the Public Poker School for Children in a few months to save up another roll for another try.
My mind had been slowly changing from, "play like Bart Hanson" to "Play like the crazy person you used to play like." As with all things, I was searching for the proper middle way in regard to these two things.
I wanted to use SOME of the hand selection I had learned, and all the hand reading I had learned, but I didn't want to just search for value and fold to every raise. I'm sure that is a boring way to grind yourself to a nub while taking down some bbs.
Instead, I wanted to use the things I found naturally in my early career: Soul-reading, baselining ops, watching for deviations, zero fear of bluffing, and letting those things help me make decisions in hands.
When I'm at my best, I trust my reads, and I am willing to completely change my path in a hand based on them. Adding the skill of hand reading and a little bit of preflop discipline (as in keep your vpip under 80% instead of the usual 95%) had the potential to change everything for me.
I headed back to the casino with one thing in mind. "If I go broke today, it will be because I aggressed into the top of range. I'm no longer waiting until one of these nits wants to get all in based on their hand strength and hoping I coolered them."
I was worried it would take a lot of time to get back to the way I used to play, using reads and aggression. I WAS WRONG. It was like I had a beast inside myself that had been chained during all the years of "fixing my life."
All the drinking I wasn't doing, all the fighting I would never do again if I could help it, all the insanity that I had systematically removed from my life. It all came out of me in a concentrated spew of aggression.
You only have one pair? I'm all in. You are betting your draw? I'm all in with second pair. The torture card just came out on the river and you checked? Im all in. Preflop, squeeze, squeeze, squeeze. Muahahahaha!
Also, the dark lord of blind aggression blessed me with zero coolers on the day. I fucking crushed that day. Also, possibly more importantly, I had a ton of fun and couldn't wait to rest up and get back in there and do it again.
Is this just a lucky day, or will it be the day that changes everything? Tune in next time to find out. Also, if you prefer degen stories, make sure to check out the rest of my blog. Thanks for reading.
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